I was thinking tonight about getting or making an asexual pride shirt.

Then I started thinking, where would I wear it, except around my place? I’m not particularly out here; San Francisco, this ain’t. And I’m concerned that, if certain people found out my orientation, I could be in… a significant amount of trouble. Possibly losing my place to live, and being in a lot of trouble professionally. (By the way, if you’re tempted to respond something along the lines of “Don’t be ridiculous, that doesn’t happen to aces!,” follow these simple steps: 1. consider that I know my own situation better than you do. 2. don’t.)

This isn’t the sort of place where people stop to consider, “You know, my homophobia and heterosexism is at least ostensibly rooted in the Bible, even if I myself do not believe, and there’s no Biblical prohibition against asexuality”*; even if it were, people who want to hate will twist whatever they want to their own ends, much like they have those Bible verses that mention having gay sex. I’ve heard “Biblical” arguments for condemning asexuality before, and I know other aces have had problems with their churches. Besides— by being asexual, I am declaring that I am a woman sexually uninterested in men. That’s practically heresy— in fact it is heresy against the kyriarchy.

I am lucky in that my colleagues, I think, couldn’t care less about my sexual orientation. It’s just people in positions of power over me.

*and it would not be okay if this were that kind of place. I’m not saying heterosexism is okay as long as it doesn’t affect me. I’m trying to explain why it does affect me, since I know it is a commonly-held idea that aces face nothing worse than ignorance.